Ruth is the vibrant go-getter. Danang likes to sit back and relax. She makes quick decisions. He likes to weigh his options. She is always eager to step up to the next level. He believes that everyone needs to take a moment to enjoy where they are today. Two different people, two different takes on love and life, eventually found each other at the right time. Six months after serious dating, Ruth and Danang decided to bring their friendship to another level. They’ve learned about each other, surpassed their problems and learned to accept each other’s differences. And two years later, he proposed to her in front of their parents and family.
As if it were some test before entering marriage, their course of wedding planning was somewhat shaky for them. Decisions had to be made in a timely manner, wedding jitters, family coordination, and so on. There were times when they feared that they weren’t going to make it, like the love they had between them was beaten by the massive amount of pressure that were on them. But they have decided that love is a decision that they have made more than two years ago, and they are going to plough through the petty problems and vow to work on their love for the rest of their lives.
When I was just a young girl my mother used to tell me that I should marry someone like me when I grow up. Like me meaning someone from the same cultural and religious backgrounds, same takes on life, same viewpoints, same kind of upbringing etcetera. She told me “relationships are hard enough for two people with the same background. Imagine if you have to deal with differences every day.” Well, I’m glad I chose to deal with differences every day, because no matter how far and wide I could have looked, I would never find someone exactly like me. My mother was right, relationships are hard. Dealing with differences and sorting out misunderstandings are indeed tiring. But after a little more than five years of marriage, I’ve learned that love makes it all worth it.
Love is a tricky thing. It can be a feeling that comes and goes depending on how sweet my husband is to me. But it can also be a decision that I make every day. And I’ve learned that when I do decide to love him every day, despite our differences, that’s when I have unlocked all the benefits there is to gain from love: his strength is magnified in my eyes, his weaknesses reduced, and I’ve gained the energy to make this relationship work. Relationship is probably not the easiest road to take in life, but love makes the journey worth travelling.
I am reminded once again of how powerful a decision to love someone can be when I see Danang and Ruth. They have made the decision to love each other along with all the consequences because every rose has its thorns. In this they have made each other worth fighting for and have promised to walk hand in hand in a journey towards forever. And what a beautiful journey I believe this will be.
Love,
Maya
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